War of the Worlds (2025)

Mr Deans. Represents a clear and present

danger to the national security of the United States.

You have. No idea what men of God can.

Do. The surveillance industrial

complex is collecting massive amounts of data with the Goliath

programme. Our most precious resource on

Earth is data, and data is food for the superior intelligence.

I've seen this, I've seen this. Can you tell yet what they're

comprised of? No Sir, I've never seen anything

like this. I when this video is coming in

from all over the world, terrifying Sheen's blood

talented meteors. So wait, give him an Amazon gift

card for 1000 bucks. Hurry.

Bitch, get out of the way. Hello everybody, So welcome to a

very special episode of Clear and Present Dudes.

Now we're planned for a little while to do A to do a little

kind of live episode that we're calling Clear and present

bruise. Not so much live episode, but

it's recorded in the living room with a few drinks.

It's more of a casual kind of thing.

Let me introduce my colleagues and loved 1A man who has thus

far today not had to use his AK Sonia Buckson, although in his

case it's probably AG 36. A man who saw the lights of the

Goodyear blimp and they said Meg Dunbar's a pimp.

My wife Amaroe Freel, a girl like me trying to romance since

the 12th grade and I am drunk as hell but not throwing up.

PHR still blowing up. I'm Rory O'Toole.

I'm not ice Cube. I'm judging by the judging by

the statistics we've got on our streams, I'm not sure a lot of

our followers even are aware of the the early 90s work of Mr

Isomaya Cube. And with that, yes, we are doing

the 2025, the brand new hot off the presses.

Damn, son, where do you find this Amazon War of the Worlds?

This was sort of our immediate action plan that we had to

implement. We had planned to do another

film but I had to go to immediate action with this one

didn't will add some being it. Just kind of appeared out of

nowhere. Really, the gunshots were hurt

inside the building, Fiat for the safety of the hostages and

we had to do do this, this horrendous piece of Amazon

marketing, take it away and back down both.

Oh, OK. Want an introduction?

Thank you very much. Yeah, you're right.

So of course, discussing yes, the 2025 American screen life

science fiction thriller film loosely extremely loosely based

on HG Wells is 1898 Noble War of the Worlds.

The film was directed by Rich Lee with a screenplay by Kenneth

A Gould and Mark Hyman from a story by Gould.

It stars Ice Cube as we've disguised by Phoenicia.

It was released by universal features on Amazon Prime on July

30th, otherwise known as Kate Bush's birthday and and my 2

cats birthday, and the film receives overwhelmingly negative

reviews. I guess we're going to jump in

on. Oh God.

The plot I'll, I'll do, I'll do initial bit of the plot, I think

guys. And then I've got several points

that hopefully we're going to touch just through the sort of

section here. So the so the plot centres

around Department of Homeland Security officer William Radford

Ice Cube and he works for a government surveillance

programme that can monitor every person on Earth.

Some calls Guardian. I've got notes on that.

His relationship with his pregnant daughter Faith and his

son Dave is strained due to the use of this programme he's using

to constantly monitor them. Shocker.

Again so much to most go on to but not while helping FBI agents

try and track a mysterious hacker known as disruptor stuff

to go on about that meteors begin striking all over the

planet and then from those meteors large machines emerge

and they start attacking humans which will and his friend Sandra

who is something or other NASA as it seems to be an alien

invasion. I think we go as far as that.

Let's go back to a few bits, so. Yeah, that's the main sort of.

So he starts his day. I sit down his little chair,

he's got coffee, so he's coming from outside.

He's in his little building. Nobody else works in the

building. Yeah, he's in a giant office

with nobody's in it. It's the opposite of a cool

obstacle. Yeah, it's a desolate obstream.

It's the kind of option you sit in one weekend when nobody's at

work plugging all your my wolf apply he's And so he sits and

does that. He goes and logs in the morning

and he has a little job to do. Flashes up at 9:00 in the

morning. He's going to Dewey's little

surveillance, which for him is clicking on the White House,

looking at the camera in the White House.

Everything's fine there. White House is looking good.

Oh, there's the policeman that's in the white.

House. We checked all that.

Everything looks all right. Selena goes right.

I know what I'll do now. I'll store my children.

So he clicks on his daughter. Faith, who's going to

Georgetown? And then every time, every time

it looks at somebody, it does a little readout about them,

Doesn't it has like name. It's like watchdogs.

I was like watchdogs, yeah. And it's like a little bit of

information about them, which is just their way of clumsy, like,

putting out exposition. Yeah.

But for him, it's like it goes on.

Faith. Faith Radford, student at

Georgetown, Baby daddy. Mark what tick and little green

tick next to it. Baby daddy.

Tick, I said, you know that like he's editing like meta data

himself. So flash it was baby daddy.

Everybody else who surveils, it's like, you know, father of

expectant child. Yeah.

So it would be husband, partner, boyfriend.

Otherwise something like. That some dismissive years of

yeah, like, busy. Threat assessment I'm.

Yeah, like what's what's her threat level?

What? What does?

That mean, I think if you're unclear about the threat your

daughter poses to you, write that ice cube in this film.

Or you're playing a really good Crusader Kings play.

An early hint that this movie might not have had the most

straightforward scripting process is that he already works

on a on a near omniscient system.

Yeah, that can access or everyone's information.

Yeah. To the point where his daughter

is in a coffee shop he phones are up to give a shit for buying

a muffin. Yeah, hard boiled eggs right

next to you. Yeah, and he, he fucking berates

that for a protein intake and he's got a fridge rigged up for

surveillance. That's normal.

I don't see a lot of protein out there.

What the? Fuck, I mean it's in the fridge

where the lights meant to be fucking turned off anyway, so

her so her electricity bill is like really just because the

surveillance state commandments of the future?

What he's covering that for us at least you could do is.

Why are we paying $800.00 for your dad?

Put cameras in the entire fucking house.

This is the kind of thing air being being horse go to fucking

gaol for, good grief. You know, it's like this.

Your dad is. Yeah, Reddit post.

Am I overreacting? My dad, who's an arch member of

the surveillance state, has cameras in literally every room

of my house, which I do not share with them by the way.

You know, I more like I cohabitate with my dad.

However, he does have an eagle eye inside my fridge.

Am I overreacting? Yes.

I-32 female. My My Dad 53 rapper.

So pretty early in the movie, he gets a phone call from Eva

Longoria's Sandra from NASA, and she's like, are you seeing this?

At which point somehow she just pipes through to him, like, lots

of stock footage of different storms happening around the

world, and he's great. So there's one thing.

This is the this is the first time you hear it.

This movie's full of additional dialogue recording, like ADR.

Yeah. Because clearly what happened

was when they were filming Ice Cube scenes, we gave him the

screenplay, the scripts, the shooting scripts, and they just

had him in a room zone. Just really, you can see it

reflecting these glasses. You can see the scripts.

I don't even know I've got a photograph.

And clearly for everyone else's scenes, they've had to like when

it cuts away to the computer doing stuff.

They've had to get them into like a sound booth to just

record a bunch of extra dialogue.

So like she's showing all this, like all these storms and the

clouds swirling and lightning. You see this shit and.

He's like, oh, right, that's crazy right there.

I don't deal with whether I deal with people.

I watch people. Yeah, fucking specific ones.

Your own daughter, Captain Overreach.

Not so much helicopter parenting A surveillance drone.

Parents. Keyhole Parents.

So then he sees his son make a $248 purchase on Steam.

Yeah. Getting really into to simulated

railway. I mean, that's literally the

only kind of like high value purchase it's going to be right.

And we're like, it's not going to be like I'm not bought like

tropical 4, tropical 4. It's all working to play if I'll

press that game and. Listen, no response to Delaval

isn't going to simulate itself on its own.

And and all of us fucking DLC was like about like £12.

Yeah, even if it bought like Tropical Six, I've wanted to buy

like that apparently aren't as good as travel.

Go for Viva president. Wouldn't it be 240 fucking

bucks? He's.

Not a cent. Yeah, he's fucking really deep

in like Truck Simulator 2024. He's just downloaded all of

them. He's Kurdistan.

He's he's, he's trucking and fucking maybe just trucking.

Hopefully. I mean, he's.

Like he's older than 12, actually.

I don't. Know.

Yeah, yeah, he's almost. To have a job.

Is is is old enough to have friends on the Internet?

I retract the statement and see the remainder of my time.

But then. Then Ice keep us a real dipshit

movie. It's pretty horrible.

He just like hacks them to his son's got it as he's playing it.

Just like actually I've uninstalled that for you so I

can give you a hard time about not having a real job.

Yeah, it's like, are you funny? If you like uninstall that, but

then uninstall games that are like related to the surveillance

state like you like installs papers, please holder.

And it's like, listen, I'm sick of you with your space pilot

bullshit. We're gonna learn how to refuse

people and read the Ostatska, Gloria Ostatska because their

passports obviously homemade. The next thing that happens is

meteors start striking all over the planet.

Shit and then 5 miles definitely gotta hit us.

And when when shit starts going down, the news starts looking at

open source info, doesn't he just starts getting.

Yeah. And one of these, one of these

sources of intelligence, the Department of Homeland Security

users to formulate a briefing for the president.

Yeah. It's Fox News.

Yes, incredible scenes. Let's let's let's go to the

channel that by its own, like, by its own recognisance is an

entertainment channel and like. Actual reporter.

Yeah. And they get taken up by Meteor.

They just take like some stock footages and reporting and some

of them awkwardly handing back to the studio they thought put a

computer generated fireball in here instead.

Which kind of sets the pace for a lot of this film's visual

storytelling. It's just so much.

We've got some stock footage or some green screen, we'll blow

something up. We'll use Adobe After Effects or

whatever. I'm not computer nerd to to put

in fucking like tripods, just just cutting around.

Just sash it in around the fucking place like they go on

the planet. It's working on it.

Ice Cube gets a team's chat message from Donald Briggs,

director of Department of Homeland Security, AKA the guy

from Agents with SHIELD. Yeah, I was.

So excited when I recognised I was like, my God I know I got.

Yeah, and the guy? 20/20/20 He's not going out.

It's it's COVID, you know, why not do a movie and get a few?

Yeah. Fucking yeah. 2000 people.

Yeah. Yeah.

So, you know, I don't think it's ass.

I don't. I would rather they were in this

movie and they were in Golgados. Imagine video.

You know I memory hold that so thank.

You no actually, actually right. I descend to that because I

would have like to have seen ice cube just freestyle over us just

going on fucking dirty gangster freestyle over it.

They're all like Oh my God, imagine all this shit and like

an ice cubes. I can imagine fucking like

imagine I got 2 chromed machine pistols in my hand.

Bitch yes, that's the reference the gross of Mars, a film that

he has said is the worst film he ever made.

OK, fuck your ice cube because from cotton the rules and also

up until now I'm sure he's now. Yeah, he may have changed it by

now. Go some bars man.

So will Redford. Ice Cube sends a chat message

saying we're under attack Machines from meteors.

Exclamation mark, exclamation mark.

And Vine was the director. I would, I would.

I would hit title. Yeah, exactly.

Are you talking about? But he's just like.

Briefing reporters. Anything else?

I've definitely had a callback of music on teams for much less

incendiary messages than a weird attack.

Good grief. Explain yourself ice cube.

What the fuck you talking about? Are you drinking again?

I feel like that could really have improved the film in so

many ways. Yeah.

So they have an emergency Zoom meeting.

We're treated to a lengthy summarization of what's been

going on by Ice Cube, and it sounds like he's reading this

for the first time as he delivers it in the movie.

Mr. President, gentlemen, we're seeing a full attack on our

infrastructure, on power grids, water communication and top

level military targets. They knew exactly where they

were going and they are systematically eliminating

resources and our ability to coordinate a response here.

Let me show you these locations are our global response

headquarters, our most sensitive targets, and they're taking them

out 1 by 1 based on their prioritised destruction of these

critical intelligence command centres.

My analysis suggests nuclear power facilities are next.

Electric grids will follow, leaving us completely helpless.

Do you see that they're grouping to concentrate their attack?

Exactly. And they will be much stronger

in groups. So if we concentrate on armed

response assets to our high priority locations, we can hit

as many as possible. I think it's the only option we

have right now on the. Basis of this one Zoom call

harder. The United States entire

military force says, yes, we're going to knock all these

creatures. And not only that, but 38

minutes into the film, a news report comes out that all of the

Western nations, China, America and NATO, Yeah, didn't realise

America wasn't in NATO. Yeah, Yeah.

It's well, right. This is this is not reality.

When? When America did.

Or maybe. This part was just filmed later.

Yeah, this, this is possibly in the future context, Donald

Trump's meeting Vladimir Putin today.

Have you heard, have you heard in monitoring situation news how

Putin wants Trump to meet him directly off the plane?

The Putin wants Secret Service protection for himself as well.

That's wild. So so we could have a situation

when America is not needed. Anymore Anyway, all the nations

have agreed to set aside their differences, solve World Peace

because now we're in a war of the worlds.

Yeah. To defeat this alien menace,

they treat to another montage of various stock footage of where

they've clumsily edited some tripods into the background.

So you've got like, got like, guys rushing out of like, an

armoured personnel transport and there's a travel walking past.

Yeah, you've got. Like those guys in like 2008

weren't fucking UCP. And there's and there's.

Yes, I noticed how. Many times we pause this film.

French French Detective Bamas. Holy shit.

I'm like, that's right, dear. Lots of British chanutes.

Somehow I'm married my. Favourite is the guy using a 50

Carl on the American cruiser. Like, OK, if you're using a

handgun against the tripod, your ship's doing something wrong.

It's all you had, I guess. HMS Thunderchild wouldn't have

fucked about with small arms. So we get that for a little bit,

the various, the various military bits.

Again, it's all done through open source.

I'm honestly surprised they didn't have any armour three

footage in there. Oh.

Since actual news agencies have used armour three footage, they.

Did they did that, you know, when Ukraine first broke?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I was insane.

It's like I saw I saw the holy shit that was and it's even like

the same like hold down right click zoom thing and it's like

this is this is fucking Armour 3 how?

Long has armour really been a thing?

Though Armour 3's existed for 10 years and they're still and and

they're still updating it because.

I'm just and when they start using all of course it's very

very strong. But when when they start using

it in use then like just. Recently, and so at the start of

Ukraine, there was lots of abject comedy when especially

Russian news sources like like Tasmania and I think, All right,

yeah. And obviously we're using like

just footage from fucking. And you can see this.

Yeah, yeah, and like the very like distinctive, like all my 3

traces and stuff. The Houthis recently did a video

press release. Oh, look at this.

This is this is our drone taken out an American ship.

But it's like it's literally fucking all my three guys.

The few scenes when the military are trying to fight against

tripods. My favourite 1 is when the call

in some some gunships and they're like oh the the Cobras

are coming in and there's a scene with a Cobra gunship just

kind of hovering for a bit in in front of us and it's like all

I'm thinking is like be me. Young millennial snake driver

born too late to blow up T50 fives at the Battle of 73

Easting finally get to attack something large Fly through the

city, feels goodman.jpg See big leggy tripod.

She's so cute dot PNG autistic meltdown don't know what to do

get get her alive by a mysterious Bieb.

It's just like, it's just like, I mean, I mean, we should we

should kind of just say what happens?

Force a load of helicopter gunshot pilots to watch this

film and you're saying I'm angry they get especially at the scene

when they refer a load of Blackhawks as Apaches.

Despite initial successes will notice as the machines

concentrate around data centres worldwide.

The larger machines then disperse smaller intersectoid

creatures to harvest data inside these buildings.

Right? I'm going to stop there.

So the next thing that happens is these little creatures, these

little bugs. Aren't they?

I mean I get it because bugs and whatever so smart like my boy I

get. Fucking my head, yeah.

Not be literally anything else, just to mix it up.

And they start eating data. What is data?

Data is what makes those black boxes to put on oil rigs that

are known to the guys in the trade right as the stop the oil

rig exploring box, it's got a little red flashing light.

You're told, you're told I know some lads work offshore told us

that's right. You're told don't touch it,

don't touch it because it runs on really, really heavy data

streams. And if you eat the data from it,

if some hungry bastard comes back and eats the data, you.

Know. Then then then the stop the oil

rig exploding box is deactivated and makes oil rig explode.

How the fuck does data pig turned off make the oil rigs

explode in this film? It's.

Footage of the actual it's it's so obvious, it's Deep Water

Horizon. Shit, the fucking that's.

Actually, I'm fucking remembering poop cruise now.

Poop cruise. Holy shit, poop cruise.

Oh my God. I wanted to watch that and my

wife didn't let me. Oh, it actually, it actually has

Texans in it, so they shouldn't watch it.

They actually use the footage of fucking Deep Water Horizon.

That's one of. The big problems is as soon as

the data is gone. Yeah.

And then all GNS data is gone, Yeah.

New GPS systems work, Yeah. So then all the ships crash.

Yeah, because ships have always used GPS.

Exactly, exactly. Magellan was the early adopter

the the Vikings. The Vikings invented GPS.

You know the call, the call of GPS for your turn positioning

system. There's a belief that the

pirating system, because I believe the giants told them

where to go. Following the stars and.

Then just like. Just follow.

You need to click on it. And right Click to just like

navigate longship and then it gives you options of various

like. You need to follow and then you

subscribe to bearing. And then, just like the ships

that feels because of the GPS lost, all the planes just follow

the sky as well, because the planes need dear it's.

Like why did you get over again? The footage, I will say the

footage of that 747 for a second, I don't know if you've

seen it or not, but there is really horrible footage of, I

think it's a cargo 747 flying out of, correct me if I'm wrong,

Baghdad airport. And it was quite a kind of

famous video at the time because carrying a lot of cargo that had

been like basically not strapped down at all.

And this plane just fucking like basically defies the laws of

physics, goes into a horrible crash.

And it's awful of witnessing. For a second I thought the scene

of that and I crashed. I thought, shit, they haven't.

They haven't gone lively and done like an AI upscale of it.

They didn't. But it did give me a little bit

of a flashback to it. Yeah, it's like, but the fact

that. So did people die on Deep Water

Horizon? Yeah, lots.

Yeah, I thought so. Yeah.

That's that's really fucked. I mean, there is I guess mental

heartless, but there's kind of a cut off point I think if you use

the Hindenburg or something. Yeah.

Like, like people. People would realise

ridiculousness. Feels there's enough distance

between the. Event.

It's like out of living memories.

Yeah. I mean, I mean, if there's

people alive who were maimed in that accident.

Where does it end? So like, what's the cut off?

OK, yeah, let's say 911 is probably not OK.

Yeah, yeah. Said yeah, this is entirely like

going a bit off top, like they had one of the potential victims

of this Zodiac killer actually give feedback on the Zodiac film

that will. Go so.

You'd be surprised. Yeah, maybe they'll be like,

hey, are we doing this respectfully?

David Fincher. Straight thuggin they do.

Respectfully, that's pretty cool.

Yeah. But I mean, I guess I don't

know. Could you do something?

Like that. That's Patrick Ice Cube.

Like rolling up with the House of someone who was horribly

named in Deep on Horizon and said hi.

Yeah, to me. Look, I'm contractually obliged.

Check if you're cool with this. Are we cool with what?

Are we OK? He has a few DVD's of Ghosts of

Mars. I'm sorry about the Deep Water

Horizon incident. There's an additional fucking

DVD of Ghosts of Mars. By the way, he has a Pam Grier's

telephone number. Be fair.

I'll be cool with that. You know what?

Yeah. Awesome.

And Ghosts of Mars, a much better film than this.

So they harvest the data because this allows them to strengthen

their machines. I can't know what that means,

but this. But that allows them to continue

to defeat human forces. So eating their data makes their

machines stronger. I don't know how that means.

Anyway, forget about that. To Mr. Smith.

Will also big deal work for Will Radford?

Yeah, because he's been hunting down this disruptor guy.

But we didn't talk about the FBI raid.

Oh. So we.

Need it was so good. Right.

So so when he's doing his actual job, is looking for a particular

hacker group called Disruptor, which is like Anonymous, which

is already an incredibly outdated reference.

Yeah, totally. I mean, that's but yeah.

Yeah. But if they were, if they were

any good, they would have released the Epstein files,

right? So that.

Would be great to release those signing.

Please do that I guess. So, so, so he starts that

morning and they're going to do an FBI raid and this has

obviously been planned. It's on the books for a while

but will play the cowboy or he gets a search warrant that

morning. That warrant, man, Where is

Warren? Where is Warren?

Where is Warren? The FBI, Steve.

FBI, Steve. Fucking FBI.

Dickness at second was like if WhatsApp existed in like the

18th century in a second. It's like a text off Miller,

like you should kill yourself now and like a text off like

random Hussey. I need cock and it's like this

is what it's like. This is terrible.

Some sort of confessions. You've all seen those memes.

Come on it. Wouldn't just be Steve.

From FBI it would just be Steve who isn't part of your

organisation. So they got this FBI right on

the go. And he's talking primarily to a

woman called Agent Jeffreys. Yeah.

So you get a combination of the head Cam footage of all the

various agents who are doing it. So you've got like some probably

like tactical CQP. Yeah.

Comments. You've got opinions about that.

Oh, he. Very much does.

For that in a minute, but before I hand it over to you, the thing

that's happening at this time is he's having a FaceTime chat with

him the entire time. So she's doing the raid, but

she's also got her selfie Cam on and she's holding the phone in

front of her face talking into it on the selfie during the raid

and then the CQB happens. Yeah, to be honest, believe it

or not, the CQB didn't have me going.

Like really? No, terrible because I mean

it's. Like OK with this one compared

to. I mean, it was hardly like

really, really super cinematic. Then I'm again, really.

But that's not what we're doing anywhere.

They're doing kind of like, like, like they were moving

deliberately towards the room that they believe the guy was

in. So you're not seeing like the

whole all the busing doors down. They're kind of flooding the

structure. Plus it's just fucking two of

them, which is silly by the way, because come on, this is like a

guy that the FBI is that for like instead 2 fucking guys.

Two guys. Yeah, well, we'll just like

minimum, not fucking two guys. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know.

But you've just got a point man and a guy to the left, guy to

the right. Now you've got two guys and the.

Biggest, biggest, it's the United States federal law

enforcement agencies the go in, in, in, in fucking numbers.

Like like a look on like a lot of law enforcement subreddits,

which is wild stuff. But I saw someone saying that

the once witnessed DEA I think do like a raid in their

jurisdiction that they had like kind of provide support for.

And this guy said, I'm really got strong.

But this guy said the DEA used more flash bangs than he'd ever

seen in his life be used. So these so it's just two guys,

2 fucking dudes just bullying long and it and it's fine.

It's a fine scene because at least they're not trying to make

it look super badass. The thing that gets me is that

there's nothing to stop with them having the agent having a

body Cam as well, which means that she's not walking around

with that phone and fucking flagging oppose with with that

fucking side on because she's literally flagging them while

talking on a phone and saying. Instantly sure body Cam to be

able to justify the whole screen life.

I mean how? How?

Well, I mean he's looking at a screen, isn't he?

I think the reason she's got a phone and like not doing a body

Cam feed is that there was probably a product placement

deal about the phone. And I mean, it's the feds.

I mean, like I saw like footage just that week of like, I think

it was ice turned up at someone's house and he was

fucking dead cored just to blow the door open and then didn't

even like press the advantage and another structure.

They just like blew the door open.

It's like, hi, we're here now. Now that's the Oval reach of

federal law enforcement and its budgets, you know, holy shit.

I. Mean it's very ice cold, let's

be honest. Yeah.

So. Like all the back and forth

moving away from me now. Yeah, that's.

It you're done. This is where you put like a

black sheet over my. Yes, go.

On So the FBI get into that room and they find out that Oh my

God, disruptor's been using a VPN and he's not there.

Think that's something that will.

Sponsored by your VPN. Use code clear and present

dudes. So that's important context

about the FBI stuff and his son and this disruptor search.

And then he finds out that his son is disruptor, which is

really bad, not just because he's a really bad NSA agent for

not figuring that out sooner, but also, but also he's stalking

his son. Yeah.

So that's a pretty important part of his sons life.

From what we can tell, like it doesn't seem as in depth as I

mean, obviously can only gather so much from what you've seen on

the screen, but like how in depth he's just watching his

daughter versus his son, which is just as purchases.

Maybe he's just found a way to hide.

Those is is you. Don't want to give this film any

credence. Necessarily, this is not.

Like guy who puts girl dad in his Twitter bio energy.

He's constantly brushing the fucker off like everybody tries

to call him. So yeah, honestly, I'm not

surprised. Yeah, that's true.

Yeah, he said. Yeah, you're right.

He is a yes like I was like NSA agent John John 316 Gildad

devoted to my daughter faith not not on speaking terms of my son

disruptor. So they have a bit of a

discussion, I think. What does he say?

Goes. It's you.

It's you. And it gets up and walks around

the empty office for a bit. It's you.

That's the Hannibal spin and everything.

Yeah, I. Agree.

Hannibal spin. Is that a thing?

Well. Yeah, yeah, like, well, after

he's pretending like he's not aware of the fact that he shoved

Abigail's ear down Will's throat and like, flaming him from her

the whole thing. Anyway, enjoy Hannibal, Watch

it, don't whatever. And it's just, it's just

ridiculous. Oh God, oh man.

Oh God, oh man, you. Know what this expression is?

This expression is like YouTube thumbnail of like I bought 5

North Korean smartphones and they stole my identity and now

I'm dedicated the principles of Juche.

But yeah and. Then his son gives him son also

just makes an absolute mocker. She's like right, not only

you're a bad NS agent for not realising and disruptor.

I've also done your job for you. Take a take a take a look at

this and then and then he shows some class of information about

a severely operation known as Goliath.

All right. And this is another point where

I think the movie screenplay has went through several rewrites

because Goliath is now meant to be the near omniscient,

incredibly powerful surveillance tool.

He's already using an near omniscient, incredibly powerful

surveillance. Tool.

Yeah, there's another one. There's another centre, but

you're. Gonna shit.

Before you. Do that's like fucking that's a

that's a predictive, predictive AI models.

I take a nose when I get to take a shit.

This is the moment the total surveillance turns into Minority

Report. Pre crime.

We're going to know when the tripod's going to steal your car

before it even arrives on Earth. Is this film pro or anti pre

crime? So the other thing that's really

weird about this is, is that Dave sends him all this

information about Goliath. Then you get a, you get a little

montage of him looking for all the data he's been sent.

He gets basically he gets in like a WinZip file and he opens

it up and extracts the data. And then there's like videos,

meetings. Look, I'm sorry about this, but

one C conference, it wasn't, wasn't recorded on video.

It was not. Obviously they didn't have that

power at the time. But but they also when they had,

they had a stenographer in the room, but then at the end of the

meeting they threw it into the fire.

And a lot of them, what we know about the one state conference

count of the Nuremberg trials, what they didn't do is record it

all and then go. I'm sure that'll be fine.

Yeah, that'd be fine. I'm sure.

I'm sure we haven't got any hackers or, you know, this is

only the Department of Homeland Security comprised of several

different organisations, some of which involve cybercrime.

But I'm sure it's fine. That's.

Fine, that's fine. So then that happened and then

so just, I just didn't expose it.

That exists. And then secondly, turns out

that the aliens had already been to Earth.

Yeah, which I didn't catch on 1st watching either.

So like I, I've got to tell you guys, I wasn't paying too much

attention, so sorry it was. Yeah, it's all like UAP's and

Project Blue Book and Roswell and stuff.

Oh yeah, you do see that. Yeah, you see project.

Blue Book Roswell, by the way, That little, right?

OK, that typewriter font using this bullshit.

No, it's not. But you can actually get that

for free off of some fun website.

And I know because it's got that like you should like the letters

have like a little extra little like kind of defect under it.

And that's like something you got like 1001 fonts.com,

whatever it's. Called so that's amazing.

They have to cut costs somewhere.

Yeah, they had to cut costs everywhere.

Surely they have to pay a spot like like bringing the social

medias surely? I mean, they probably paid them

a bit. I think the actors were probably

paid not much because it's like like, Hey, Ice, what are you

doing right now? Well, I'm, I'm, I'm smoking weed

and jacking it because the year 2020, I'm stuck in that fucking

cool mansion and like one big film is like how much you can

pay us like 300 bucks is like, all right.

I'll do Eva and Gore is really good mates with Jeff Bezos, his

wife. Oh, Jesus.

Really. Yeah.

Fucking hell. Oh my God.

This is, this is. It's all coming together so.

The big rule from this is that apart from the Goliath, the

existing, the big thing is they knew it would bring the aliens

to Earth, but they wanted to do it anyway.

Which doesn't make any fucking sense to say because, like,

right, If you've got a plan to deal with the aliens when they

get here, Yeah, No. Again, not to give this any

credence because it's a very valid criticism, but these

people are very short sighted. They just think whatever it will

be, someone else's problem at that.

Point, yeah. So they don't give a fuck until

they're like, oh shit, that's right, consequences.

I'm thinking real quick. Yeah, she's like, but it was

didn't expect it that that rapidly.

You know, it would be like like like thousands of years.

But which point would have alien defence protocol?

Yeah, but have massive lasers would have XCOM.

Ready. Well, assuming.

That XCOM mentioned. That at any point between then

and when it would happen in this metaphorical 1000 years, they

would actually put money towards such a thing.

Yeah. Maybe they were just like this

is a problem for ice. Magic a bunch of guys in fucking

multicam and skeleton gloves square up against a tripod.

I mean, one of one of the FBI guys did pull a handgun on a.

Tripod. Yeah, it's like what?

What that just reminded me of when the first time you see a

tripod is when he's talking to his daughter on the phone and

she turns the face the FaceTime camera around to point the

tripod and ice Cube goes get a away from that thing as you say.

I I should deal with it because they're aliens.

But but good news, guys, we've got our own aliens.

Superman's joining the team. Yes.

What? Henry Cavill no with the new

guy, no. Brandon Ruth no.

Is that is that Dean Cain? Television Superbad, star of

star of multiple bad faith-based films.

Kevin Sorbo. Kevin Sorbo, FBI Christ fucking

K Sorbs with a silly. Sue Sue.

The next thing that happens is Will Radford gets on to another

Teams chat with his son and the rest of his sons hacker friends.

And they're old and there's just a book bunch of edge Lords.

Oh man, I meant to make a note of all that.

I liked how one of them was called Thelma and Louise, but

it's just one person. And I like that.

I like that because biggest, biggest, biggest, that's this

guy's like fucking counterintell, isn't it?

Because this guy's call himself Thelma and Louise and like, Oh

my God, it's two people, but it's just one dude.

And he wants to see that just like regular teens went.

Well, of course, the, the, the, the big nasty trade boards, They

eat the data. And that's eat the data from a

web camp and they eat the data. The data that anonymizes the

webcams and all of a sudden they say, ah, all your base, I belong

to us and I can see you at this time.

I'm amazed I didn't use that phrase in the movie.

No, because they actually. Like, yeah, I've been.

So they do. So they do say at one point in

the movie do a barrel roll. Yeah.

And of course. Move, bitch, get out of the way.

Which which made my soul die a little bit inside.

That was bad. So as you as you alluded to the

the anonymizing software turns off and then the aliens then

attack all the hacker guys. Yeah, apart from Dave, because

once again Dave's using AVPN, right, which they didn't just

VPN, I don't know, right. Anyway, the.

Film was sponsored by Nord VPN. Probably.

Yeah, it fucking should have been as well that it wasn't

actually as wild as it. Okay, if you got log in and N

VPN, I'm going to add you to my plan.

But July was 5 devices for just $90.00 a year.

Just $90.00 a year dead. Is that right?

Yes, I'm just $90.00 a year. There's two bits we haven't

talked about, which is not mega but it's okay.

One, his daughter is pregnant. The daughter is going into

labour. Yeah, and the daughter's wounded

from a tripod attack which caused him to drive a Tesla

remotely. So we have a Tesla.

No, no, you're saying a Tesla. No, she.

Didn't go to Tesla, She didn't go to Labour.

Yeah, because. It.

Was a baby shower baby? Shower.

Yeah, Tesla. I just assumed she would, but.

She doesn't, because, yeah, it's expected, isn't it?

Yeah. It's really she hurts a femoral

artery or something like that. Yeah, I really like how it made

me a bit upset. How like, Oh my God, heart

rate's 110. This is really bad.

Normal for me. This is a low heart rate for a

man whose entire diet is just caffeine from cans.

Yes, yes it is. And I know it's a low heart rate

for you, but you're amphetamines.

A baby daddy, of course, just happens to be an Amazon drone

pilot. That's right, yeah.

He's actually kind of a sweetheart, blossom.

Yeah. He seems like a good.

And he's probably the least offensive person on the movie

for me. Yeah, even if he does.

Work for Amazon. You just kind of instant order.

Of flesh. This this film actually kind of,

I guess, preempted the a massive slew of first person drone

footage we've now. Oh yes, in the.

Past few years. So with the slashing Netflix

budgets. Are we going to be able to order

drone strides of Amazon? We're not going to be able to

but but people significantly more powerful than us probably

will I. Mean I could give it a shot.

Do you think the release this film would take hit off the

Epstein files? That's not even the they're just

they're just flooding the structure, man That's you say

you baby Ireland Jeff this mess we not now, Jeffrey grainy

footage of like walking up to the prison door and then like

footage of like a tripod being taken out on a stretcher you.

Know what the fuck I didn't? So in a nod to the original

novel, yeah, they realised that what they need to do is make the

aliens poorly through a virus, but not a regular virus like

influenza, but a computer virus. Asking for.

Places to call? Me.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So they try to upload a virus to

it, which works for a little bit, and then they shake it off

and they get used to it. And that's fine because what

they need to do is they need to get fuck me, they need to get

Ice Cube out of that office. Yeah, they need to get away from

that chair and having to a heroic sacrifice.

So. So they need to fly.

Wilfred Brimley in in OPS centre all over mainly shoots the

scenes when he's sitting down and in OPS centre of course it's

when he stands up and bollocks the president for having sex

with journalists. If he stands up to the

president, another another actor who's created as the president,

there we go. And it's Jim Meskeman who if you

don't know, if you follow my Instagram, he just does those

loads of impressions. He's an impressionist and he

does a really good Robin Williams.

He does loads of them and just like.

Does he does he have a cameo page?

Because we should. Totally.

He must do. Two things are happening.

One, agents from SHIELD guy, the director, Will Radford, just

breaks cover immediately and calls them.

Just like I know about Goliath. OK, brilliant, great, excellent

trade crafts. Deleting all of your accounts

now you've lost your fucking privileges also.

Spotify Premium. That's gone.

Pisses off he doesn't use two factor authentication one, but

it doesn't matter because he doesn't have any mistakes

because the sons like I got you dad.

I got your dad straight away. And then get some more back

again. Yeah, just like, oh, and I'm

back in now and the music kicks up and it's like blue.

I mean, I'm gonna fucking do my thing now, which is clicking on

some screens more. Right click Commandeer drone.

Yeah, so the director, just to prelude all this, the director

is aware of it. Director's like, you know what,

we need to blow it up. We need to get rid of it.

It's only what's gonna work. So we have to blow the building

like you are in the ice cube Soz.

Yeah. So the B2 bombers are launching.

They're gonna be here any minute.

Here's some stock footage of B2 bombers over the desert on the

other side of the country. And I don't know, even go over

the ocean at some point. Probably.

Water underneath. Them and of course they had the

footage of the pilots as well the rear face and camera footage

when obviously I make a fucking F16 yes 18 or something and even

Emma realised I was on something normal he's like yes Rory,

whatever, whatever, but yeah yeah it's.

A. Single fucking person.

You can just blank it out OK every time.

I was so bad. It's like you did.

Yeah. So, so, so, so these are so

these are the stakes. A big BT bomb is going to come

and destroy pretty much Washington, DC, Yeah.

They're going to bomb us twice the sea as well, so they're

going to double tap it just to kill the rescuers.

Wow. Very cool, America.

Yeah, it's very fucking cool. Yeah, you do.

I. Guess.

Exactly. So Ice Cube is still wants a

solution to this and he threw in his daughter who was a

bioengineer, realises that computer virus alone won't do

the trick. But if I mix my cannibal code,

cannibal code with my DNA stuff makes does sound good with your

computer stuff, we can make it work.

Have you got a pen drive? I've got a pen drive.

We don't have pen drives in the building.

We're not. Allowed in the building.

Right. Anyway, why can't you take?

WhatsApp phone calls on this government fucking hardware I

can't do. That they do.

I checked in factory this with my wife.

They do have it but it's not as but it's nowhere near as

popular. I mean that would be a good.

Way to advertise it, yes, but. Again, why am I trying to give

stuff owned by Facebook better? Yeah, well, because Facebook's

in there as well. By some companies anyway, so

they say. Right, OK, we're gonna get the

cannibal code. We're going to send you a thumb

drive. You have to but but right.

And here's the thing that pisses me off.

OK, so I had, I had a nitpick section, but I'm just going to

go straight into it. So baby daddy is an Amazon

delivery driver or whatever term they have for that now.

It's probably like a delivery technician or engineer or

something. Parcel strike technician.

Fucking leg. Fucking leg customer.

Customer satisfaction enabler. Yeah, who?

Who? Who wants to piss in a jug?

Delivery enforcer. Delivery enforcer, Yeah.

So he says, look, look at this boom, whips up this little

drone, OK? And it's like, this is a Amazon

Prime Air delivery drone. We've been training us for

months. It's the future of Amazon

deliveries. Yeah, but you have to make an

Amazon purchase because even though the world's ending and I

have what you need in the back of the van already.

I've got a bit of lock up the purchase so buy something.

Fucking buy something dude. I mean, if I was feeling

generous, I would say it's kind of like a reference to the sort

of like how red tape just gets in the way pointlessly of things

like that. But again, that's me just.

Giving you too much credit, probably.

Yeah, that's because. But you're probably right.

I mean, you're probably right that it's in there just to add

like a little bit of extra kind of tension, like just like, you

know, biggest but biggest. It does add another like 10 or

15 seconds. Oh.

But he thought it was one click and it was so quick.

Yeah. You've got to make it a tight

90. Yeah, I got it.

I don't know how you could make it longer than 1090 I.

Have my little fucking shooter on the grass.

You know, conspiracy theory was actually drastically fucking cut

down and the rework, a lot of things I'll tell you for a while

later. Okay, interesting.

I'll take that. So, so they get the drone up in

the air and they fly that, and then immediately this Amazon

delivery drone driver starts becoming a fucking Maverick

because he's like, I've got a bulky on my tail.

I've got a bulky myself. So they teach you that during

Amazon primary school? The sun got had deleted later.

Probably a player of the game. Yeah, yeah, Beast and No Man's

Sky too. What about?

This again. It's like, why did you deliver

that parcel so late? Because it was inverted.

So the drone's flying. Yeah.

And then he needs urgent air support.

So Ice Cube commandeers a Reaper drone.

Right click Comedy A. Drone and then and then with no

training in general for. Whatsoever.

No fucking 2 FA either. Ah, you're trying to comedy a

river drone. Why don't you just open up

authenticator and put in your phone's pin number?

Unlock Authenticator. Fucking please enter the.

Microsoft code we have sent to your phone.

Bureaucracy. Every damn time and.

It just gets it and all of a sudden he's he's shit hot at it

and it's like, nice kid, don't get cocky.

He's the Han Solo to his son. Yeah, and there's a Han Solo

reference, so there's a really confusing bit where they've got

drone footage of the building. Yeah.

And they've got like a tripod. They have the Reaper drone that

it's from the Reaper drone, allegedly.

And then he a tripod and then rather than try and figure out

how the little Amazon drone goes into the building, they just

have a big exclusion and then they're in the in the building.

What you're missing out though as well, the really good bit

when the drone ends up crashing a bit and the bribe a homeless

man fucking homeless guy. And it's like the whole it's

like the whole thing. So go you, you walk me through

the desk and you see turtle on its back.

It's a turtle. And also, so there's some

homeless guy in a fucking tent. Oh, gorgeous.

And they're like, and of course he accesses his phone.

He's like, hey, man, fucking pick the trone up or what?

Like we'll get you a new phone. Why?

So the government can spy on me. It's like valid.

Valid concern. Valid.

They're saying give me $1000 Amazon gift card woohoo.

And he's like. Yeah, I'll do it for $1000.

What you do for a like bar? Kill your wife.

And like fucking incredible scenes and, and, and so there's

who in the sky that get him like save the day.

Cool. So the next thing that happens

is a fucking drone is in the building and it's flying along

and I have to mention it so that during the sequence there's a

couple of really this is where the jokes start getting really

lame. And that's where the ADR gets

particularly obnoxious, right, Because lots of people like, oh,

go off when it flies into the building.

Then somebody goes like you were crazy for that one man when he

when he Reaper drone a fucking tripod and then and then and

then somebody goes. Oh yeah, OK, just go off.

And you're crazy for that one. So you're.

Crazy for that one. It's something I've been some

reference in previous episodes. Like when that's what he said,

like a Twitter account posting a picture of like Gillian Anderson

or something. It's like she was insane for

this one. It's just standing there,

existing. She sailed the come ship to the

Mother Port and then they're trying to direct the drone down

to where I suppose ice keepers running down to the to the

server room in the sub basement. They're trying to get him to

meet the the the drone. The drone's got low batteries

fire along. Someone yells turn left at Han

Solo. Like someone else knows the

layout of the building. His daughter knows the layout of

the building. She doesn't make any sense.

See, she's, she's actually flipped the script.

She's actually surveilling him the whole town.

My fridge has got a camera on your camera my.

Fridge is inside you. Wait, no.

The Amazon drone, just to hammer in the joke, that was a little

model. It's not even a joke.

There's a model Han Solo there. When she says turn up to Han

Solo, the interface also shows us a little rectangle drawing in

the the Han Solo and it says Han Solo on the screen just so we

definitely catch the joke. It's like, oh, you're it's.

Funny. Yeah, well, your base will

belong to us and then so random low I can have cheeseburger.

You have no chance to survive for your time.

What is human but miserable pile of secrets?

Move that for great justice. I know this is all being said

ironically, but it's also all of them.

All of it is survive. Epic bacon, guys.

Looking at myself in the mirror like yes, pile of miserable

secrets. Talk.

How about you? They've taken my base.

You have. No chance to survive bigger

time. Said bad noises.

Anyway, somehow on riding on fumes, the the drone flies right

in front of Ice Cube. Ice Cube's running down to the

civil room. He needs to get this dongle,

plug it into a wall and that will give That will make the

that will poison the milk and make and make the alien

computers very poorly. Yeah, so, so, so very important.

So. So what's happening is the

aliens don't want that to happen.

So they are now attacking Ice Cube and these red.

And I'll tell you what, it's the only visual reference to the red

weed from the novel. Yeah, but these red tendrils of

nano machines, I don't know, attack him.

Yeah, tentacled, he kind of. You knock him on the floor, he

flaps them away initially. He says move, bitch, get out,

Get out the way. Yeah, get out the way, bitch.

Get out the way, move. Get out the way.

Get out the way. Get out.

For a copyright. That's what they wanted you to

do when they heard that. Like.

Oh, that's good. That's a really good.

That's a good current Hello reference.

That's like when when the when federal law enforcement agencies

were arresting you and like one of them starts playing like The

Beatles on his phone so they can do a copyright strike on the

video of your friends. Affirmative.

Yes, that's a real. Thing he gets the dungle and

just as it looks desperate, desperately bad.

Yeah. He looks like he's being covered

in tentacles and stuff. He's on the floor.

He's just about to get it in there.

He plugs it in. Brilliant.

There's a scene not massively unlike this in the latest

Mission Impossible movie where like it all hinges on plugging

something in and turning something off at the precise

moment and it's and hey, it's also not very good in that

movie. Oh.

Yes, we we had opinions on that. Not not good, you know.

Who would have been way better than anyone at that My boy audio

Dido so fucking funny if one like the like like like the de

anonymize the webcams that all of these people hadn't covered

with tape, by the way, Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. But but imagine if like they all

got de anonymized. One of them was just like, like,

like, water says across. Anyway, it works and, and the

aliens, the aliens fucking die. And then I guess they leak all

that information. None of the none of the

consequences of leaking that Goliath thing come out, not at

all. No one seems the the the the the

powers. Of the That guy gets posted,

yeah. That's right, he gets.

Agent Agent Coulson from the Marvel.

And he becomes, he becomes the full guy.

The only one whose face isn't blurred in any of the

photographs, which is really fucking weird.

So he he obviously faces a bit of a consequence.

And then I was going to talk about on castings and stuff,

but, but basically the guy who plays Michael, what's his name,

Michael O'Neill, who plays Walter Crystal, United States

Secretary of Defence. He goes William Rudd for the

call. And so it's like, hey, do you

want the director job? Because the director's a piece

of shit, and you exposed him. And then in a terrible move,

winning Radford. He was a perfect guy on the

inside to hold the powers to be, to account.

Yeah. And has the initial like unique

experience in this field goes, Nah, I'm gonna watch you?

Fucking like in reality, as soon as he says that some like he's

getting whacked by a Reaper drone.

Oh, you're not outside anymore? Yeah.

Yeah. He's.

Probably dead like like it's like, you know, and Wag the dog

should actually do we. Should cover.

Oh, yes, we should. Yeah.

Outside of one as well. There we go.

Fucking shit. Well, like. 10 years ago as

well. Fuck, man.

Just just just, yeah, like, just a bit when like Dustin Hoffman's

like, I'm gonna go public about all this thing.

I'm the world's greatest producer and stuff and they send

some guys just to make him, just to make him have a heart attack

in his pool. I'm.

Just going to wrap up the final bit start hanging.

So things that were happening earlier in the movie, Faith, his

daughter Ice Cube's daughter was going to have a baby shower, but

he'd but she'd unfriended her own father on Facebook, sent out

a mass invite to it and then didn't invite him to his own

granddaughter's baby shower. This you feel like would have a

longer discussion behind it, but they just they just square that

away once Yeah, there's the the emoji is injured.

He's driving the Tesla car for her.

She takes that moment to say, Dad, you just won't control

everything and you can't control everything as he's literally.

Controlling, literally controlling.

And he's like fucking faith, deny thy Father, and refuse thy

name. And.

Then the final bit is the adorable baby daddy had an idea

to get everyone personalised T-shirts for the baby shower all

based on the very current reference at the time, the Baby

Shark song. And then the final thing you see

in the movie in obviously this cements it being a COVID

production is, is the the main cast all sudden a line for a

photograph wearing these T-shirts, including Sandra from

NASA, who actually turns out is actually a really close personal

family friend and not not just someone from work from a

different government department maybe.

They just. Maybe they just felt it was a

friendship forged by in fire at that point.

Yeah. Well, it's a friend.

It's a friendship forged by him continually hanging up on her on

teams. And that's the game.

That's how you deal with guys listening.

Trim me. Clearly women like it when you

ignore them. A big event like giant tripods

trying to kill you and take your day.

At first you can't just do it for no reason.

I think this film there was like said, there was massive cutting

down this film. I think it was probably meant to

be like a kind of romance arc for them, but then they're like,

shit, it's Lockhouse, isn't it? We've got like the campaign in.

I had a list of nitpicks from this movie.

I've got a little list, we've got none.

Of them. I think, I think we covered most

of them, but I want to see if you've got any more.

So I was right off my list real quickly.

So the first one I mentioned it, Radford actively stalking his

kids, doesn't realise the person who's targeting at work is one

of his kids. Yeah, phenomenal work,

phenomenal work. 2 aliens eat all the data from Facebook but

they leave YouTube up so that Ice Cube can drop that weird EI

slop video he makes that incriminates his boss.

Holy. Crap.

Yeah, what the fuck, 3 aliens eat all the data that stop all

the plants from the sky, but the BTU still work. 4 Ice Cube works

in that building completely alone.

Yeah, seemingly no one else seems to work in that building.

But also, there are newest USB drives in that building and the

USB boats all are active still. Yeah, weird. 5 Ice Cube has to

make a Prime Air order in order to get the thumb drive because

the thing's locked. We've just.

We've covered that now. I wasn't paying attention to

that six. What's a homeless guy going to

do 1000 LB Amazon voucher when he has no fix to boot to have

anything delivered to? I mean.

I do have a potential answer to this, I don't know if it would

work though. However Amazon.

But when I used to work for Papa John's and sometimes we would

get people order on the road. So like if they were like

driving trucks, for example, like going across the UK and I

delivered to someone in a car park once.

Wow. So that's.

Really. That seems really dangerous.

Yeah. But I got a nice tip so I ain't

gonna compose. That seems so dangerous.

And you see this. Unsorted stuff could be

happening there, yes. Do you have a little bit of

pizza of Arcot Lane like? Right.

Now no one is making the Hyperloop around you see and you

see this my. Dogging spots.

I think pizza delivery drivers are basically the troops at this

and and we do need to. I did have someone thank me for

my service. Essential worker Essential

worker I. Mean I've not been a piece of

delivery driver for like 6 years now in this in as in as.

Much as there are no ex marines, there are no ex pizza.

Just. Every pizza delivery guy a

rifle. And then finally, I suppose the

last one I had was Why does Goliath exist when the Wikipedia

summary for this movie even states that Will Radford works

on a surveillance system already capable of monitoring everyone

on Earth I. Think it's crazy motherfuckers.

Clife always. Always a bigger pond there's.

Always it. Was a big fish and the wise

words of Qui Gon Jin I. Mean This is why I think there

was like a lot of rewrites because a lot of it doesn't make

sense. Yeah, as as wife's last message

to him, it's like, oh hey, remember to take the bins out or

something. Get something.

Really mundane, but Dad, punch me in the heart.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. People save the last message

from their, like, someone they love after they're gone.

Like, it's just like, Oh my God. Because, you know, I'm a sappy

bitch. No, no.

No, that's totally fair. But also Dan says that she died

of like a disease. Yeah.

And it's like, oh, be understandable.

And the last message was lol, take the bins out, etcetera.

Love you bitch kind of thing. Or, or like she sounded.

Way too, yeah. Exactly.

Not normal, but yeah, I mean, I don't know.

She's dying of the disease. Wouldn't she sound a bit more I?

Wouldn't go fuck up the bins. But more heartfelt to take the

bins like I love you. Be a great parent of the kids,

you know, I'll catch you on the flip side.

Yeah. That's that's that's my list of

nits. Have you got any any of your own

I. Mean, I think we kind of popped

off with the message there really.

I think a major on it I had to pick was the fact that like

this. As I said, this fucking repair

drones just circling American cities with with Mavericks on

them. And what if you need to drone

strike Arlington? I suppose, I suppose the movie

appears to be happening in one day, right?

Yeah. And yet, and yet they've got

like the global military responses already mobilised and

already like they've got like a carrier bat on strike group,

like already at sea in a vortex kind of formation.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I mean like they've

mobilised everything and everyone and it's crazy.

And I said I was managed to pick or as well.

It's like the amount of like stock footage, like like I said,

they're using it to show this massive worldwide mobilisation.

But even the stock footage with using it, it like looks like

there's more than just a few hours fighting going on.

You know, like you say, the distances of fucking compassions

that you imagine what a look about this, which might get in

later is that I mean, these are going to be come without an act

of war zones right as well. And that's what I love because

actually this happened like today, like right now are all

the massive fucking like lines of conflict will have like if

like some tripod lands on the border of India and Pakistan and

then just like scramble their entire air forces against us or

something. It's like Das Ultrafal or like

1-1 fucking like lands in Ukraine.

And then like 2 weeks later I just say the Ukrainians have

captured it and it's flying around painted green, covered in

explosive reactive armour and it's got a fucking bash bash

cage around it. It's like and it's and it's and

it's still like. Draining the Russian and it's.

And it's and it's being driven. It's been fluid by some like 19

year old zoomer from Khaki who's like fucking got an energy drink

habits. And it's just like like that's

all day. That's all day.

Cool. Should we do some categories?

Yeah. All right.

OK. First one's casting.

Casting. There's not a lot of casting

because there's not that many people in the movie.

Fucking. Seven people or something?

So I've got them all here. A grand bunch of lads.

Create a bunch of lads. So Ice Cube, as we've just

talked about already goes goes to Mars and all that kind of

good stuff. Anaconda Eva Longoria I.

Love her, like just desperate. Housewives, Desperate

Housewives, that's that's what most people know her from it,

isn't it? Yeah, I don't know of anything

rather than just for. Housewives, it's been.

Another. Stuff.

She's been losing stuff. Daddy, you know, and it's like.

Yeah, Clark, Greg, we talked about already, yes, Agent SHIELD

and stuff. The other.

Stuff who's actually, in my opinion, believable as like kind

of scumbag mode. Yeah, yeah, I think so.

Yeah. See, it's kind of like, oh, I

was the nice guy Coulson for so long.

Yeah. Which, you know, like, like

enjoy. I'm assuming you enjoy the role,

but sometimes you want to, you want to mix up and do something

different, you know? Yeah, even it's some similar but

different. And now he's definitely giving

me some great scumbag good energy.

He's he's he's one of those beasts in the gym kind of thick

as well. Like like he's like, like just

say I'm dialling after an exercise sessions.

I. Sweat not.

There's a weight room at the Motel 6.

Because he's the exercise man. He's right. 20 miles by 5:45.

Because he's the exercise man. His jersey.

He's got sponsors I love with the back.

He's died 57 from a heart attack.

Invite his fucking bike as fast as he can.

Easy exercise. Man.

And he's and he's got to say West Point T-shirt like, yeah,

mate, nice fucking flex. Yeah.

There you go. We've all done.

So if you're not sacked after one, you mate.

No, no, it's the world of stuff. You're not sacked after one.

You're not present, no, you just run in the department of looking

at people's iPhones. Next we have Andrea Savage is

Sheila Jeffries, the FBI agent. Jeffreys fucking smartphone on

one hand. She's been some good stuff

though. She's been in Veep Step Brothers

episodes. Step Brothers.

Tulsa King so she's she's in the Taylor Sheridan verse now.

Henry and Tuval plays the Sun. Dave Radford, the video gamer

and hacker known as Disruptor. He hasn't got many credits.

He was in Harriet, the Cynthia Areevo Harriet Tubman movie and

the Watcher, which I think was a Netflix series.

Yeah, was about some guy stalking somebody with Naomi

Watts and Bobby Kanavali. Iman Benson, business daughter

Faith Radford. Her credits again aren't massive

suits though. She was in a all black remake of

Uncle Buck. Right.

Which I just found out exists. Wow, that's incredible.

And all the Midnight Club as well, which is one of those,

Michael Flanagan. All right, Yeah.

Things right? Cool.

And then Devin Bostick plays Mark, Mark Goodman, who's the

Amazon delivery dude. He was an episode of Fargo Real.

Hero he and Oppenheimer. He was in Oppenheimer.

Yeah, it was, yeah. Seth Nederman.

He was the explosion. Yeah, and.

The reason I know that is just because people kept mentioning

it on Twitter saying like the massive jump from Oppenheimer.

To yeah, what Wiles. Yeah, he's had Susan from

Oppenheimer. So Fargo Season 5, which is a

great season of Fargo the studio, which is that brilliant

new show with Seth Rogen. And then and then This War the

Worlds. So basically this is like being

pulled out of his, like this is the skeleton.

He's gotten away with it. He thought he'd got away with

it. He thought he got away with it

and the fucking caught on the replay the VAR the VAR fucking

caught it and all of a sudden the ghost beat this loud.

OK, the the only two that guys we've got are Michael O'Neill as

Water Crystal, the SEC def right?

Yeah, you might not organise and I don't know if you will.

It's been a lot of stuff. Dallas buyers clubs Sea Biscuit,

but I know him primarily as being the Secret Service agent

who I think cops one of the chest in an episode of The West

Wing. Oh fuck yeah.

A. Lot of these shows have all

these films have West Wing connections.

Yeah, he's also in Tom Mcclancy's Jack Ryan as a

senator. Holy fucking shit, which which

which season? 2019 So is that season 2 I.

Think she's? Is it like similar how a lot of

British actors end up in Doctor Who or something like?

That it is like that, yeah, very much.

Oh, West Wing, definitely. The West Wing West Wing took a

lot of people on. Everyone full of that guys.

It's a fantastic show for that. And then just Jenna, I mentioned

earlier on Jim Meskeman, there's POTUS, who is that that that

great impressionist who does does good?

Robin Williams, and he's got loads and loads of voice

credits. He's primarily a voice actor,

but also was in The Fresh Prince of Bel Air and Parks and Rec,

who's in Apollo 13, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, and he's

in Land Man as well recently, so he's also in the Taylor Sheridan

verse. God damn.

Who isn't these days? Yeah, I was on COD.

Blops, sorry. Called Call of Duty one or two

6/6. What the?

And he plays Bill Clinton. Of course 6 is in the 90s one.

Oh my God, holy shit man. Yeah, So that's that's it for

the caster. There are no over that guys.

That's everybody ask quote with the movie, there are.

It's eminently quotable for Ice Cube.

I don't watch whether I watch people.

Okay, you creep. That.

Was you. That was you.

That was you. You.

It is it is. It is the best.

It is the best like. You.

I've got a few already. Take your in the galactic ass

back home. Yeah, back home.

Like the fact that he said like, nothing in this PDF that you

showed me is gonna convince me like that you're telling the

truth. And then like the first he

clicks like Oh my God. You convinced me you're telling

the truth. I'm so fucking convinced guys.

Never mind. When he when he hangs up on

Sandra the first time he says well I got bigger fish to fry

than watching clouds. So fucking rude.

A woman is trying to flirt with you.

Maybe she's not. You see, that's why I think it

was Stephanie. Like romance?

Oh, I think she's right. She's there.

She's there at the, she's there at the baby shower.

That's the thing. Yeah, like, yes.

Oh my God, Can we talk about the weather?

Yeah, a little bit of small talk.

Are you feeling a bit moist? It's a bit humid here.

A bit humid, yes. Oh shit, it's aliens.

Oh my God, it's so hot. Oh my God, I feel.

Like. It's a bit humid.

I feel like I'm being invaded. Right now, air pressure.

Is crazy, but it's Sonya's attempt at flirting there, he

said. I feel like I'm being invaded

right now. Baby daddy.

Final quote I've got is also from Ice Cube which is Good

morning ma sweet baby drone. I actually quote of the film.

Yeah, so needle drops, there are not many needle drops in series.

There is one at the start, which is Keep Your Head Up by Wolfgang

Valbrun, which is the highlight of the movie.

Is that that that brass pit coming in and it's downhill from

there. That's the highlight of the

movie for me. And then after that it gets

really bad. The composer of the movie is a

guy called John Natchez. And this is another example of

people who previously this is like his first composer credit.

Everything else, everything before this is music department.

So orchestration maybe, or some of the other sort of best

prestigious work? This is 2020, right?

All all the big names for furlough pay, all the big names

getting followed and the pulling up guys and girls who've done

like stuff adjacent, like how about your big break?

Awesome, Thanks, Gee Willigas. And then like, here's the thing.

We're going to hold this film in a back pocket for five years.

We're going to reset just to extract from the Epstein files.

Because they knew, and they let it happen and it let it happen.

I guess, I guess, I guess the live didn't see everything.

IMDb trivia for the movie, right?

So there's a lot of it. The only interesting one that I

found. I'll maybe go for a few more.

First one here is the character of William Radford was

originally written to be paraplegic to fit in with the

themes of COVID and people being glued to their screens.

But the director was so impressed by the intensity of

ice cubes chair throwing, but he rewrote the character to match.

I think I mean it. Was I guess it was intense.

Can you throw a chair unintensely?

You know how there's that story of how Sean being the audition

for shop and the director is like, oh, I didn't think shops

the Yorkshire was. Yeah, but he is now kind of

thing in a Sean being accent. The only the only kind of the

thing I can imagine here is the ice cube walked in and was told

he was playing paraplegic character and said fuck no I'm

not. I picked up a chair through with

someone. Because.

It was 2020 and they're already all done.

Like nose forms and shit and all that stuff just to get him in

the building. Like just fucking Hiram.

Fucking ambulance. I'm trying to imagine Ice Cube,

Ice Cube and Sean Bean. Ice Cube in the role of Boromia.

Oh my God, it's a gift. A gift to the foes of Mordor.

They took the little that. Would be intriguing to.

Say. Phenomenal work.

Phenomenal. Give him a moment for pity's

sake. You're a kind ass.

Back to Eisengard. To Eisengard, everyone loved him

so. Much like his father was just

like just loved him so much more than his other kid.

I mean I get. It Jennifer was a cunt.

Yeah, one of the names on Williams team's display is

Horsen G Wells in Horsen Wells in HG Wells for the Sick.

Yeah, they're all boring, right? Okay.

I'm so sorry. Do you have any notes from the

piano gallery? Notes from the piano gallery

when we when we go through letterboxed, mainly letterboxed

to get just use that generated content and funny reviews that I

can read to my colleagues on this excellent podcast.

The signal and noise ratio on this is pretty, pretty crazy

because like I said, this is a film that's very much right in

the zeitgeist. Now.

This is why we did this is our kind of immediate action.

This is our Operation Nimrod with gunshots here inside the

house. But I found some funny ones.

You have to dig through a lot of like, oh, no stars worse than

ever. There are worse films in this.

I managed to finish this film for a start.

I haven't managed to fucking finish.

Yeah. I mean, that's kind of the

criteria. So half a star?

I'm crying bro half a star. This makes you want to cancel my

subscription to Amazon Prime and I have it for free for being a

student. I can't believe you're still

getting absolute dog shit like this in the big 2025.

That's awesome. 2025 is the room.

Excellent group watch with drunk friends.

There we go A. Horribly acted, terribly

written, incompetently made film brimming with embarrassing

amounts of Amazon product placement.

It fucking rules. They just don't make abysmal

garbage like this anymore. Unity store asset flip game in

movie form. The purest distillation of a tax

write off movie. This movie has an uncountable

amount of unintentionally hilarious screenshots.

This fool and you. Please don't ever let Amazon

Prime make an original again. It's a shame they're usually

good, but this is so bad it made me lose faith in everything but

here. At least it's not Snow White

half a star Ice Cube schizo Amazon psyop movie written by

grandpa who yells his grandkids for not knowing his computer

I loved. Was no because that fuck ass

fake Vertigo shot sent me into hysterics.

I know we're talking about yeah, the Dolly zoom.

Yeah, Dolly zoom from his own desk with the green screen

backgrounds. What the fuck?

I've been I've been getting really into AI milli hell of a

boss GOI note that stands for drag off instructions and

watching the Netflix sad man show on Instagram reels in 62nd

intervals. I've seen enough Will Radfat can

easily solo Goku stars 2 out of 10 straight out atrocious

dumpster fire. Seriously, alcohol helps with

watching this piece of data. Shit beer of vodka over some

fresh hell ice cubes. This view will self destruct in.

Derp derp derp fuck sorry HC wells chat GP bullshit damn why

Oh my God holy shit. And just this one that I fucking

love. Finally a feature film with the

exact energy of those opening videos.

You have to watch it escape rooms before the Ice Cube abuses

NASA privileges to remotely access his trifling son's PC in

order to uninstall No Man's Sky so that his worthless progeny

may pursue gainful employment. This makes profile look like all

the presidents and another one that I couldn't find even I saw

before. Maybe because the aliens at the

theatre was just it was. It was perfect actually on the

second watch. This film is bad.

Why am I saying this most egregious oversell of the

military and just all complex. There's no way I can do all of

that. Right click Comedy at Drone.

Yeah, got to be. In fairness, that's one thing

that get right, and that's the constant excessive the amount of

Microsoft Teams notification sounds that haunt me.

Would this movie be better if it had Doctor Jack Ryan, Doctor

Richard Kimble, or President James Marshall in it?

I'm just going to say yes, I don't.

I'm not sure I even make it fix this film.

So I've said that make it worse. I wouldn't wish this on any of

them. Yeah.

However, President Jack Ryan would not have allowed such a

heinous overreach of the security industrial complex.

I personally, I don't know, you are probably the the President,

Jack Ryan. Expert, the president expert

having at the time of writing ran out my Amazon.

It's not my Amazon my my Spotify audio book hours this month on

on the Bear and the Dragon. Have you ever done that before?

I have did it once. So we have a lady's voice like,

hey, you've run out your free audio book minute.

I don't think President James Marshall would be any different.

President James Marshall and President Jack Ryan wouldn't

have let the shit happen at all that they would have been

fucking on top of it. Yeah, would this full movie have

benefited from a weird little scruffy guy played by Peter

Falk? And this film needs Colombo to

be surgedly implanted into at least three different times.

So I think. It was.

So I think Will Radford should have been played by Peter Falk.

Yeah, totally. But instead of having the

Guardian system, he should have had like a CB radio and like a

fax machine. Yeah, and like a coffee machine.

Yeah, like taking place in like 1984 and.

It should have been like. Six or something and like it's

and it's not the War of the Worlds.

It's just another episode of Colombo.

Yeah, Yeah. Instead of instead of machines

from Meteos, it's a race track owner.

Yeah. Whose prize jockey has died.

Yeah. In mysterious circumstances.

Yeah. Would this movie have benefited

from Lieutenant Commander Samuel L Jackson, United States Navy?

You know what I'm going to say? Yes.

You know, I'm going to say here if they'd made a movie out of

this and they had any actual scenes with actors in different

sets. Yeah.

They could have had. I love how they could just like

fucking dissing everyone. The film is not an actor.

Actors. Are very.

I mean, like, Ice Cube probably considers himself more of a

gangster than an actor. He's a businessman.

He's a businessman. He's a businessman, He's a

businessman. That's actually a reference to

yeah, right, Samuel Jackson. He should have been the

commanding officer of USS. Unfortunately for this movie,

USS and the Child, yes. And where they have one heroic

like 1015 minute sequence where they destroy 1 tripod and they

get absolutely nerved. Sing this motherfucker.

Yeah, yeah. He's got to say motherfucker.

Rank speed, motherfucker. Flank speed, motherfucker.

There's some Ollie bird crashing into a tripod and going down.

So let's let's fucking like walking this out for a second.

USS look like child right? It's actually a fucking civil

war era steam ram that was never actually used against the

Confederates, but she's still a museum ship and some.

Battleship in there. Yeah, yeah.

So Samuel Jackson is like, obviously I come like, I can

like see you and he's got a bum fucking post and right.

Because hang out this museum ship gets the chance.

Like, oh, go on, Thunder child. And yeah.

Forgetting that that that was a film.

They use the steam ram USS Thunderchilds.

The plot as well. Is this movie pro or anti CIA?

I mean, right they. Weren't so there's no CIA in

this film. Therefore it's pro.

We've got the pro, we've got the DHS, Which.

Is doing the thing. Everyone doesn't want the CIA to

do. With DFS.

With DFS which is a furniture shopping.

News finally, the Ding Chavez award for missed opportunity in

the movie there were. Actually fucking tonnes of

missed opportunities. Yeah, just save the line, Mike.

They could have made an actual movie based in the novel War of

the Worlds by HG Wells. It could be for cut off.

But seriously, they could have done like a Victorian era

cylinders landing and yeah, official common, you know?

Even just having a ship called Thunderchild, a massive missed

opportunity. It doesn't even need be HMS

Thunderchild, a steam ram. It could have been an American

Thunderchild. Maybe just destroy something?

Like that. But yeah, the groups have

Operation Thunderchild. We're going to use the

Thunderchild protocol, literally.

Any of our references like like, like, like, even the names and

stuff like. It was berefted of references

that would have made you go like.

Sandra Ogilvy from NASA. Yeah, like, you know what I

mean? Just like anything.

Like instead of like, having the name of HD Wells.

Awesome Wells. It's just very disconnected from

it. Other than the tripod.

Yeah, things just it gets loose as fuck.

Is this using the name? Yes.

So yeah, yeah, yeah. So my main thing was there was

no HMS or Operation or USS or whatever Thunderchild because

that would have ruled. Because Meg, remember, you and I

discussed we should fucking Co write a novel about H West.

Under child, Yeah, and a. Fucking POV kind of thing after

we looked into the fact that people are writing approved

novels based on based on War of the Worlds.

Steven Baxter. Yeah, no Thunder child.

That's mine. Lock it in.

Sweet. I mean, I guess that wraps it up

one more. Question How would this go down?

Yeah. Oh God, 9.

There you go, it doesn't. It doesn't.

We don't do that here. That's.

Falcon, this wouldn't go down down in Germany because we

insist on being the most moral army to lose the war.

That's fucking stupid. We didn't do anything wrong this

time. Thanks.

All my friends are dead, my wife's gone, all my apes gone.

All my apes gone because they would eat all the NFTS.

That's the best thing. This film was out before we had

the real the real data eating, which was the NFT.

Oh God, they. Must be kicking themselves.

Indeed. OK, so that was War of the

Worlds. That was War of the Worlds.

That was something resembling War of the Worlds.

Yes, oh so much. If we get turns, if we get this

out before the next one, I don't know, but our next movie is

going to be Firefox. Our next movie is going to be

Firefox. 1982. Yeah, it's it's the first for

our listener. I request thanks to Jim and

Crammington. Very excited to see Clint

Eastwood Grimace's way through stealing a Russian super

fighter. So that's going to be great.

Very excited. Cool.

What left this to say is thank you very much for listening and

we've been clear and present dudes, I think.

We actually said it in 10 minutes.

War of the Worlds (2025)

What's This About?